WAveywave's Xanga

Things I hate the most about driving in Malaysia:

Mon, 12 May 2008 23:54:00 GMT

1) People who litter, and especially those who spit from their cars.

2) People who don't give way.

3) People who cut in the front just so they don't have to line up like everyone else.

To the aforementioned idiots,

Why do you think it's okay to dump your shit onto public areas where the bacteria from your filthy pus-filled mouth can fill the air? Swallow your own bloody phlegm if you can't find a tissue.

Why is it so difficult to show some courtesy and let a signalling vehicle pass? Will giving way to one vehicle slow you down an hour or force you into bankruptcy or give you a terminal illness?? F*king idiots.

Why do you think it's okay to cut in and make others who've been waiting patiently wait even longer just so you don't have to?? Who the fark do you think you are, assholes?

Ok. Rant over. Back to work.

Good morning

Mon, 26 Nov 2007 20:43:25 GMT

I cannot believe that I am awake at 8.30am. It's one thing to be awake because I haven't gone to bed yet and another to be awake because my eyes opened themselves at 6.30am in the middle of an awesome dream and won't go back to sleep!! EURGH!!

For the past two nights I've been dreaming of rebellion. First I dreamt that I was a member of some Chinese resistance movement committed to driving the British and the Japanese out of our homeland. It was a cool dream because I was such an awesome arsekicker in the dream. It was a romantic dream (ahh, how do we leave out romance?) because I met a boy there... So very mulan-ish. And just now, I dreamt that I was caught in the crossfire between the police and a gang of thugs who decided to use my hotel room as a hideout. In the end they proved to be softhearted rebels fighting for a cause, and of course I had to join them. We went to their hideout and they put me in a room and suddenly there were shots fired into the room from the opposite building and I jumped down and crawled to a corner and watched the bullets whiz by. Maybe all the excitement woke me up. :S

Oh and did I mention the tall brooding handsome dude who happens to have a son that I realised upon introduction is mine? Don't ask me how that figures. My brain thinks up the most outrageous things sometimes. Lol...

There's something in the air...

Fri, 16 Nov 2007 12:56:12 GMT

A few nights ago, I went out for a meeting with Calan and as we sat in the open air section of the cafe, I couldn't help noticing the air smelt of the sea even though we were in the heart of the city. I didn't think much about it then, but tonight when I made a trip to the grocer about a minute's walk away, I was again hit by that distinctive scent.

And I lingered for a while, comforted by thoughts of being on vacation at a beachside resort.

9 am the clock says...

Thu, 15 Nov 2007 21:15:11 GMT

I am tired but I can't sleep. There are so many things - and yet there is nothing - swimming in my mind. I have lost the motivation to study for my last exam. I lost the appetite to eat. And now I can't even sleep.

Well at least I've put my insomnia to good use. Up till 2 minutes ago I was living in a sty so filthy and messy anyone could walk in and catch something within 5 minutes. Well now my desk is still messy, but at least the rest of the house, well, looks like a house again.

Ohlie's sitting at the sliding door, no doubt enjoying the sun. It's getting warmer now. Although I really can't tell because I keep the hours of someone living in Moscow.

55 days...

Tue, 13 Nov 2007 14:48:21 GMT

... to make something out of my life.

I am afraid. I am discontent. I am unwilling to settle.

Shall I succumb to a life of mediocrity? Will a day job and some hobbies tide me over? Throw in a marriage and some children some years down the road? Will this suffice? Will I find fulfillment?

Something tells me I need more than that, that I was meant for other things... not necessarily bigger things, but definitely... different... things.

This may be my one and only chance to find some kind of meaning, the abstract "raison d'être" that has eluded me these 23 years... and 55 days are all I have.

Everything changes...

Wed, 15 Aug 2007 04:53:45 GMT

Melbourne is still so beautiful to me... In fact, sometimes I think it has become more beautiful over the years. I still love everything about her - her sights and smells, her fickle character... I remember feeling as though I would be here forever... 5 years seemed like forever for the longest time... and yet so suddenly, it is already coming to an end. I tried to hold on, I tried so so frantically to breathe in all the memories at one go. Despite my loved ones being back in KL, I felt like I was a tree being torn from where it has taken root. It sounds so silly... after having been away for so long, I've actually become prouder of my heritage and country - and yet, why was I so reluctant to go back? I grappled with this for a long time... until...

I realised everything changes. Most of my friends have gone home. Most of the remaining ones are now working. I feel left behind, and sometimes I get so lonely. Yesterday I sent my cousin back... And although I was going to see her soon, I teared. Because horseriding alone isn't going to be anywhere near as fun. Because I am going to miss annoying her. Because I am going to miss her stupid jokes. Because she was such an integral part of my Melbourne life that her absence has changed Melbourne once again.

Then I suddenly realised that even though I still love Melbourne so much. It was really the best time for me to go. When the memories are still good. the laughter still pealing and everyone's footprints still fresh in my mind. So I'm finally ready. Now begins my last walk with Melbourne.

Nostalgia...

Tue, 17 Apr 2007 06:16:40 GMT

Altan. Liz. Joyce. Tj. Jasmine. James. Joanne. Eugene. Tin Wai. Fadzli.

People I haven't thought about or spoke to in a long, long time. People whose names and faces I can't get out of my mind today. People from a different time, a different life. I wasn't close to all of them, but I'm thinking of them nonetheless. And the people that I was close to, I guess I was destined to miss them sorely.

In their testis to me, Altan and Liz always talked about creating memories. If only they knew... memories would one day be my only link to them.

Where would I be...

Sun, 18 Mar 2007 12:41:33 GMT

30 years from now? How many of the people that I call my friends would still be in my life, I wonder. My dad brought me to his high school reunion dinner last night. One of his former classmates brought some pictures of their schooling days, and I swear I have never seen my dad look so young!

I looked at them - all middle aged women and men - giggling over old photos and teasing one another about high school crushes. They sang oldies together and some women cried as they reminisced about the past. And they laughed... oh how they laughed.

Laughter is such a beautiful thing - it brings colours to the pictures long left in the attics of the memory, it buries old hatches, it draws you closer to the precious things you thought had slipped away, and it unites you with all that you thought you had lost.

Where would I be in 30 years? I wonder how many of the people I call my friends would still be in my life.

I love...

Sat, 17 Feb 2007 13:09:27 GMT

the way you look every time I step out of the airport. I love the way you smell and the way I feel so at home with you. I love the memories we've had together and I love my life with you. I love your colours and I love your sounds. Home is where the heart is, and you know my heart is with you. The day I have to leave you will be the hardest day of my life.

Happy Valentine's Day!

Wed, 14 Feb 2007 15:53:12 GMT

I have never had a valentine's day like this one...

I worked till 9.

I took work home.

I didn't go out at all.

Some even thought we had broken up!

But little do they know, I had the best celebration of all... A ramly burger, a packet of teh-o-ais, a dozen beautiful roses (the largest I've ever received, really), a cute little teddy and the 9.30pm WLT show.

So romantic, don't you think?